It was horrible. Three young, female zombies trooped into my classroom tonight and sat down, expecting me to teach them English. They couldn’t have been more than sixteen. By all outward appearances, they looked like a trio of Japanese pixies. Only their dead silence and eyelids that drooped to their knees exposed them for what they were.
\nHorrified though I was, I took a deep breath and decided to give it a try.
\nToday’s lesson: Give a speech about your morning. “I get up around 6:00.” (That’s something these zombies can relate to, I thought.) “I brush my teeth. After that, I eat breakfast.” Simple stuff. Or so I thought.
\nThirty minutes in and we’re still on drills. Their insidious droning was a narcotic, and I had to fight to stay awake.
\nMe: “Repeat after me. ‘I get up around 6:00.'”
\nThem: “I………. get………. up……… around………. 6:00.”
\nMe: “Great! Excellent! Okay, again. Repeat after me: ‘I get up around 6:00.'”
\nThem: “I………. get………. up……… around………. 6:00.”
\nThis went on and on and on and—you get the picture. Teaching English can be so exciting!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It was horrible. Three young, female zombies trooped into my classroom tonight and sat down, expecting me to teach them English. They couldn’t have been more than sixteen. By all outward appearances, they looked like a trio of Japanese pixies. Only their dead silence and eyelids that drooped to their knees exposed them for what… Continue reading Teaching English to the Undead<\/span>